I'm going to try something with this, which is to talk about something very personal without explicitly stating what it is. I realize this is going to be difficult, but I want to write about it nonetheless, because it represents an important crossroads, and because sometimes I'm not so good about writing if I don't imagine someone reading it. (I don't fit the profile of a Leo in many respects, but it will out sometimes.) For the last three and a half years, I have been more or less consumed by an idea. At first just a feeling, it quickly became a strong desire and a goal. I made lists, I made plans, of how to achieve this goal. I prayed, I cried bitter prayers because the thing I wanted was so far from my reach, but I knew I could get there eventually if I just bent all the energy of my mind and my will toward achieving the thing. Off and on, I battled within myself about whether I REALLY wanted this or not or if I was simply buckling to certain societal or cultural o...